On this day last year, I was in a car accident. Just thinking about it now makes my head hurt. I was driving home, only 4 blocks away from my apartment, when a speeding car completely ran the stop sign and crashed into me. I remember seeing a man standing on the corner, walking his dog in the quiet residential area. I remember being so … Continue reading This One Time, I was in a Car Accident…
I have gone through this weird evolution of sleep. When I was younger up until the first year of undergrad, I would be able to fall asleep fairly easily and stay asleep. In high school, as I mentioned in a previous post, I would go to sleep right after school, skip dinner, and sleep until the morning. I attributed this with the emotional and mental … Continue reading Hello Sleeplessness, My Old Friend
“I would like the chicken fingers.” “I would like the chicken fingers, please.” “I would like…” “What are you doing?” Her voice broke my rehearsing. Why do I think out loud? For once, I will not overthink it, I am going to try and play it cool. “Hmm, what’s that?” Real cool. “What are you doing? I hear you mumbling behind your menu.” Oh what … Continue reading AwkAnxAvg 3: Chicken Fingers
All I need to do is breathe. Breathe and clear my mind. Feet planted firmly on the ground? Check. Palms faced up, on my lap? Check. Great! Now, take a deep breath in and slowly exhale. Okay, you are doing it, Jayla. Just keep it up. Wait, you’re thinking, stop thinking. But still, good job girl! Internal high five. Okay, okay, I am focusing on … Continue reading AwkAnxAvg 2: Mindful-what?
I am an adult! I am saying it more to convince myself than anything else. I do adult things like work and pay bills, but there has to be more to it than that. I do not even like those things, they are really draining. I am still early on in my adulting journey, I am pretty over it already. I want the reasonable, kind … Continue reading #AdultGoals
Before I could give it a name to it, I exhibited signs as of being an extremely anxious child. My parents would tell my teachers I was very shy and needed more time to warm up. I had regular stomachaches, was irritable, sensitive, and hardly spoke. My first-grade teacher did not think I could read but quickly realized that was false during our private lesson. … Continue reading An Anxious Kid, All Grown Up
You, sitting there drinking an iced latte with your friends. Me, thinking of what to say to you or how to even get your attention. I like your shirt, that’s one of my favorite shows, are you a fan? I also like my beverages cold, not with whip cream, that can be a little much. You laugh. I think what I said was charming. Then … Continue reading AwkAnxAvg 1: The Beginning? It’s Probably Nothing.