If you’re a long-time follower of my blog, you may recall posts that discuss my discomfort with sharing my blog with my family and friends. I listed it as a goal, trying to convince myself that one day I would overcome my fears and insecurities and share with the people around me. It was more about me than it was about their thoughts or opinions; my blog is my safe space, opening myself up further, exposing my vulnerabilities to people I see more regularly, is scary. I started this blog as a way for me to find my voice and freely explore learning about myself, I am glad you lot are along for the ride, and I am sharing it with others as well.
This year, I have been sharing my blog more publically; discussing it with future employers, referencing it during therapy, and even made an announcement on my personal Facebook for my birthday. Over the initial 2020 lockdown, I realized that just because we had to stay indoors, it did not mean we had to stay in our comfort zone. I was motivated by my thirst for representation and diverse storytelling. I was searching for it from someone, or some place, else while ignoring my current and prospective contributions. You’ve all told me how impactful I have been in the past, but imposter syndrome is a bitch. Just saying.
Today, I am celebrating and acknowledging one of my biggest fans, my mom. Two years ago, I finally decided to listen to her and start blogging; after YEARS of encouragement. Though part of the process, she respected my wish to remain relatively private, relishing the posts I would read to her and discussing my ideas. Well, finally, two years later, she’s a proud, official follower. Achievement unlocked, it’s time to level up!
This may seem small, but it’s a big deal and a sign of progress for me. It affirms my satisfaction and belief in myself. I am unapologetically sharing my truth, even if it’s not the most well understood, with the people I love. As I continue to practice self-acceptance and self-love, questioning the validity of my creativity, words, thoughts, and experiences, slowly fades. In doing so, it opens up the possibility of authentically sharing with others without the fear of rejection or embarrassment.
So thank you, mom, and thank you, followers, for being a part of my growth journey. Even when my blogging or engagement ebbs and flows, I appreciate your support and continuous encouragement.